Surviving the Mandolin Wind

First, please consider supporting my friend, Bob Nary, who will bravely shave his head on March 25th in support of St. Baldrick's Foundation, which funds childhood cancer research grants. You can go to his webpage at:

http://www.stbaldricks.org/participants/mypage/participantid/449710

Slowly but surely, like the daffodil shoots that are pushing up through the hard dirt, our life is growing back into what it used to be. It has been a tough two months, but I am really starting to feel like myself again. I have enough strength now that Fritz was able to go back to work after taking 6 weeks off. This was a good thing for him. He is such a social person, and it must have been terribly difficult to be housebound for the past month. But he stuck it out and never complained, and was always willing to help me out with every little thing. For all those meals that he cooked, all the pills he doled out, and the endless “Can you please get me…” requests, I am forever grateful. A few days ago, I heard Rod Stewart sing the old song “Mandolin Wind” on the radio, and I immediately thought of Fritz:

       But you chose to stay, stay and keep me warm
       through the darkest nights I've ever known
       If the mandolin wind couldn't change a thing
       then I know I love ya …
       Through the coldest winter in almost fourteen years
       I couldn't believe you kept a smile
       Now I can rest assured, knowing that we've seen the worst
       And you know I love ya

When you go through something as difficult as a stem cell transplant, you are just like a baby, totally dependent on other people to get you through each day. I’m a very independent person, and this has been so hard for me to do. As my friend Cheryl advised, “I know it’s hard, but you need to let your friends and family spoil you for a while.” So I’m still trying to do that, but soon I will be strong enough to get more of my independence back.

I’m moving around, and doing things, and walking every day, in order to strengthen my body. I’m not athletic, so I have to use housework and other mundane things as part of my exercise regimen! My legs are still a bit wobbly for some reason, and I run out of energy pretty quickly, but I’m like those daffodil shoots, pushing upwards and growing stronger every day.  Happy Spring!

Love to you all,
Fay ; )

Leaving the LaZBoy Behind

I saw my doctor a week ago, and he said my lab results are just fine. That means my bone marrow is working and producing enough red and white cells and platelets to keep me healthy. I’m so happy that I didn’t have to go back to the hospital to get blood transfusions once I came home. It is nice to be feeling stronger and healthier, and to know that my bone marrow is functioning again.

There are other signs of progress, too. I’m able to get up out of that LaZBoy a lot more than I was just a few weeks ago, when I was more or less sitting all day. My physical strength is coming back, slowly but surely. And by eating more carefully, my stomach woes are lessening. I owe it all to Greek yogurt…it works better than any antacid that I’ve used! These are little steps but very big things in my life, which make me feel less and less like a patient, and more and more normal.

I’ve even started to read again, which shows that my brain has been cleansed from its chemo stupor. That really makes me happy! It is scary when you just can’t concentrate on anything. I’m the sort of person who has read three books at a time, so you can see why this is a great development for an avid reader like me.

My doctor wants me to continue to avoid hugging people and going to public places whenever possible. They said, “If you want to go to Target, just go at 7 in the morning when it is empty!” So that is keeping me housebound more than I’d like, but it is good advice, since I would have to go back into the hospital if I developed a fever. Now that we’ve all heard about how filthy shopping carts are, you can see why public places can be a menace for someone with a brand new immune system!

My next challenge is to start cooking again. I can’t wait to be able to stand at the stove long enough to do it. My legs are not very strong, so I have to rest after about 10 minutes of standing. But I will get there, little by little. Thanks to you all for your continuing support, both personal and spiritual. I am so grateful to have so many kind friends. Love, Fay ; )